"Oh my God! I can't think straight!" Anxiety has made me feel this way more times than I can count. Now that I'm back in school, I have been challenging these thoughts constantly. Sometimes it is hard to remain calm when I have homework or a scholarship essay to do. I have been challenged by my anxiety a lot lately. No one knows how hard it is to stay calm. I will always keep fighting though. With my tools and my breath, I can do anything.
This past week has been particularly hard. I have faced a lot of anxiety and challenges with my new job, school, scholarships, and friendships. Despite the fact that most of the issues I stress over are created in my head, I still feel anxious. The difference from last year to this year is that I don't rely on others anymore. Last year whenever I would be assigned homework, I would panic and run to the guidance office balling. This year I am able to breathe, meditate, do yoga, thought challenge, journal, and listen to music to calm down instead of panicking. While having a support system is necessary and outside help is helpful, I prefer to help myself first and then talk out my issues. I finally have found independence in my life and that is amazing. I used to not be able to go to sleep without my mom laying with me until I fell asleep. I haven't asked her to do that ever since I returned home from Rogers Memorial Hospital. I was also never able to pay for things on my own because I didn't have job before Rogers. Now that I have my newly found independence, I can work for what I want. Thanks to the amazing life changes I have made, I have much more independence. I don't need as much help anymore because I know how to handle my anxiety on my own.
In addition to having so much more independence, I am almost completely finished with my hierarchy of exposures from Rogers. I have been working on them with my therapist here and I only have a few exposures left. This news is crazy to me because there was over one hundred exposures on my hierarchy when it was first made in April. I have worked so hard to complete this challenging list and it's so exciting I am almost done with it. I am down to the hardest exposures, so I am up against a lot of anxiety. Even though I am nervous about doing these exposures, I know I can do them! My work that was assigned at Rogers is almost complete, but treatment never ends! There will be many more exposures after the hierarchy is complete.
The challenges have been tough, but I am so excited that I am overcoming them! Life has been amazing and I am constantly showing myself all that I can do. These next few years will be insane with graduating high school, beginning college, and taking on the world of social work, but I am so ready! I am more independent and prepared for life than I have ever been. One step at a time, I will continue to overcome OCD.
This past week has been particularly hard. I have faced a lot of anxiety and challenges with my new job, school, scholarships, and friendships. Despite the fact that most of the issues I stress over are created in my head, I still feel anxious. The difference from last year to this year is that I don't rely on others anymore. Last year whenever I would be assigned homework, I would panic and run to the guidance office balling. This year I am able to breathe, meditate, do yoga, thought challenge, journal, and listen to music to calm down instead of panicking. While having a support system is necessary and outside help is helpful, I prefer to help myself first and then talk out my issues. I finally have found independence in my life and that is amazing. I used to not be able to go to sleep without my mom laying with me until I fell asleep. I haven't asked her to do that ever since I returned home from Rogers Memorial Hospital. I was also never able to pay for things on my own because I didn't have job before Rogers. Now that I have my newly found independence, I can work for what I want. Thanks to the amazing life changes I have made, I have much more independence. I don't need as much help anymore because I know how to handle my anxiety on my own.
In addition to having so much more independence, I am almost completely finished with my hierarchy of exposures from Rogers. I have been working on them with my therapist here and I only have a few exposures left. This news is crazy to me because there was over one hundred exposures on my hierarchy when it was first made in April. I have worked so hard to complete this challenging list and it's so exciting I am almost done with it. I am down to the hardest exposures, so I am up against a lot of anxiety. Even though I am nervous about doing these exposures, I know I can do them! My work that was assigned at Rogers is almost complete, but treatment never ends! There will be many more exposures after the hierarchy is complete.
The challenges have been tough, but I am so excited that I am overcoming them! Life has been amazing and I am constantly showing myself all that I can do. These next few years will be insane with graduating high school, beginning college, and taking on the world of social work, but I am so ready! I am more independent and prepared for life than I have ever been. One step at a time, I will continue to overcome OCD.